Every time I make the 2 hour drive to the prison where Andrew is, it is pouring rain. It's a boring, flatland drive and once again today, torrents of rain. Weird.I only had to sit around around a dingy waiting room for an hour and an half. Excellent time for anything court related! I talked to a brokenheartedmom about AlAnon. She was teary and receptive.
I was ushered into a room with 20 chairs facing a big video screen. In front of the screen sat a stiff, nervous Andrew. A woman was in the back of the room, presumably doing clerical work that pertained to the hearing. That left 19 chairs for me to choose from. I sat down next to my son.
Son was in uber concentration mode, staring at the screen. I imagined he was rehearsing his penance speech, so I didn't distract him. Soon Mr. Parole Man appeared on the screen. Magically, it felt like he was sitting with us. He looked like a disheveled professor.
He asked Andrew some reasonable questions. Andrew answered them like he was waiting for the water boarding to start. He noted that Andrew's propensity to get wasted, shoplift and get caught, then try to make a run for it and get caught, had really screwed up his life.
The whole 10 minutes of this, Mr. Parole Man is furiously shuffling through reams of paper (Andrew's records?) and typing noisily at a keyboard off screen. I hope to God he was listening, and not checking his blogs!
Mr.Parole Man asked me if I had anything to say. I started talking and he turned back to the invisible keyboard and began clacking away. I gave my spiel about my love and support, the recovery house, and the change having to come from within. He pounded away for another minute. Then he swiveled his chair toward us, leaned forward and said "looks good to me. No problems here" and the screen went blank.
Andrew and I sat there staring at it till the lady in the back gently informed us it was over. We had a quick telepathic talk--did that go well?? I don't know!! OMG, what did he MEAN by that?? I don't know!!--and he was led away.
Now you know what to expect at a parole hearing.
34 thoughts:
(shaking head puzzled)
Well, "no problems here" sounds good to me. Yeah, I think it's a good thing.
(checking his blogs...funny!)
That sounds likes something from a bad si-fi movie, WTF? I could say a ton of things, but I'm sure you don't need to hear any of it.
Well, I hope that he really meant, "No problems here."
Sending love, jeNN
I'm thinking that is a positive sign.
I am with the others in saying it sounds like good news. I hate when they can't even attempt to treat people like people. It pisses me off. Because there by the grace of GOD goes one of them.
It sounds good...but how rude. This is Andrew's life for crying out loud. Couldn't he have taken just a moment to explain what he was thinking.
I think this sounds good. ????
Well, it doesn't sound bad.
How utterly frustrating.
I imagine Mr. Parole being a bit jaded by his profession. That being said, I would have to say that "No problems here" sounds very promising!
In a perfect world I'd like to believet that people such as "Mr. Parole" can look past a hardened criminal and see the desire for change. Unrealistic I know, but a girl can hope.
Many many blessings!! I really hope things work out!
well good "f-n" grief! WTF????
No problems here ????
Here with the keyboard?
Here with the weather?
Here in paper pile?
That is just the kind of stuff that makes me crazy!
OK..well Andrew is doing what he needs to do, it sounds as though he handled himself well and did not act disrespectful. It sounds like you handled yourself and did not get all "mama crazy" or anything. So maybe he meant "no problems here"
Sounds about right for our court system.
Well, uh, hello? I don't know what to say. It sounds like it was a typical deal complete with an overworked judge that heard what he wanted to hear and will let you guys know. Hard to say how it will go except to say it could have been really a lot worse!
You have been cleansed, bathed, and statisized by the institutional embrace of bureaucracy. The little man behind the curtain just wants to make sure the numbers fit the widgets properly to keep the bureaucratic machine grinding forward. This little desk man feels that this work is good. His contributions meaningful. He thinks that he has given you hope, however confusion lays in his wake. I hope the best outcome prevails.
Sounds like a day which you both had to go through to get to the other side...the next date. Two months, ya say? That's long enough for anyone to wonder if it's yea, or nay.
Time takes Time, in this case, for real!
Sounds positive I guess.
I certainly hope so for both of you
Love
Nick
I am thinking of you and hoping for a good outcome. I agree with Kristin, "no problems here" sounds like a good thing. Right? I am sending hugs your way.
Wow, Lou. That interaction with the mediator was completely different than the hearing Cliff had. We'll take it in good faith that he was going to make the recommendations Andrew and you are hoping for and pray for exactly that!
Sounds like 1984 to me, or Clockwork Orange. Or something really sci-fi but with Victorian overtones.
But it does sounds positive to me.
Either way, Andrew and you are both where you are supposed to be. And it will be what it will be.
You know Lou, sometimes I think I live in a violent faceless dehumanised society and then I read something like this.
I am keeping fingers crossed for yourself and Andrew.
Lov
Mary LA
Wow, Lou. That was weird. I sent you the e-mail this morning before reading this post.
I have been praying for a good outcome for Andrew.
Tons of love,
SB
I was shaking so hard when I went into my Parole hearing...
I do remember people that were denied, they'd been lectured by the hearing officers for lack of remorse to not working all the programs offered, so on and so forth. The biggest preponderance comes when a Parolee makes excuses for his crime or behavior and basically does not take responsibility for his/her actions and they will let you know.
I think it sounds goo. These Parole hearing Officers, given a platform to chew your butt for any given reason, they will jump at the op and he didn't. Yes, it sounds good.
It still never hurts to continue in prayer, eh?
Hugz
you have me giggling still with "hope he's not checking his blogs"!! i can imagine by your vivid description of what it must have been like. thank you for taking me on this journey with you. i hope andrew is doing ok after that nail biter. gosh what a parent goes through for their kid!! God bless you lou for all you do, just in case Andrew hasn't said it yet, thanks for your troubles, i know he appreciates you!! still a continued prayer for the unknown element that may linger about.
Let's hope it means he will get paroled.
Thats all?! Wait. What?! That is not enough somehow after so long after so much - shouldn't there be ... more?
I am crossing my digits and saying a prayer for him - and for you!
Cat
I'm sorry, Lou, I feel your angst...I'm not a good wait-er
Weird.
Why not just let a computer do it?
It's so impersonal.
It sounds like good news to me too, but if it was my son I would not want to get my hopes up - I'd want to know what in the world he meant by that. You're a wonderful mother, Lou.
Wow, strange life,no?
I'm glad to have read your post. My fiance' goes before the parole board on May 18th. Neither of us knows what to expect. Your description certainly isn't what I was expecting of a parole hearing.
From the sounds of it, Andrew will probably be granted parole. I will pray for a positive outcome for him.
Your description of Andrew's actions leading up to him going to prison could have been written by me about my fiance'.
I pray that this is a turning point for both of them and they'll both stay sober and do the right things to stay out of trouble.
It's certainly been a difficult journey that no one can understand until they're walking it too.
Best Wishes to you and your family.
Oh good grief.... sure seems like even if he was a jaded tired little Mr Parole Man, he could have at least been kinder or more forthcoming to dear old Mom.... but even though it sounds weird and brief and frustrating, it does seem positive....
Prayers continue for you and Andrew!
Given that Jen-Jen is going to announce 300 million in cuts on Monday...I would say that as long as there is no history of extreme violence that, that went well.
I agree with everything ScottW. wrote and am a little freaked out by how impersonal this was.
Prayers and hugs.
I wouldn't take it personal if I were you. You have to think of how many people they must see and hear from each day more then likely saying the same thing no?
I'm sure there is nothing to worry about.
From what you have been telling me Andrew has been doing his thing and I honestly think that he will get it!
Positive thoughts like you tell me!
Stay Up!
this sounds oddly familiar to some processes that we've been going through for the past two years, and no closure. i dislike not having closure.
Like every one else, this sounds like a positive sign, but how strange an experience. LOL. You and Andrew are always in my prayers. Keeping my fingers crossed,
Ladybeams
I hope that it means just what was said--No problems here. It does sound unreal though.
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